You

You

Amanda Sanchez

We sit together

Conversing

But my mind wanders.

My mind thinks.

The “what ifs…”

 

What if they saw me stumble when I walked in,

“What a clumsy loser.”

What if I sit down and miss the chair?

“Stupid”

My pimple sticks out like a sore thumb.

“She’s ugly.”

It’s all in my mind.

 

You look bored.

What if I’m uninteresting…

My voice cracks, I clear my throat.

What if it was loud and I brought attention to myself.

You look up at me.

Oh no, you’re going to give an excuse that you have to leave.

“I’m having a good time.”

You’re lying.

 

We part ways.

Hours after my mind still lingers;

All the things i should or could have done.

 

The mind,

A whirlpool of overthinking.

The ability to go anywhere and overanalyze.

A good time can turn into a bad time;

Only because of the mind becoming overwhelmed,

With thoughts of impurities and insecurities.

 

-Melissa Wydak